I’m starting to feel like an addict going through rehab. The process of forming strong, solid, good habits is eerily similar to that of breaking destructive bad habits. We start off so strong, completely determined, then the shiny wears off, and we struggle to keep up. Then we catch a second wind and things are great until one day we get blindsided and stumble again. We keep going through this cylce of going strong and stumbling, each time picking ourselves up and getting a little stronger, a little more determined to keep going.
I’ve spent the last few practices (some better than others) with Asia’s words in my head. Its just the attitude change I needed to confront that nagging little brat that’s constantly trying to hold me back. As soon as I notice her kicking up excuses, I stop, refocus, take a deep, loud ujjayi breath and drown her out. “Bring it, Bitch.” I’m not asking her politely to leave, so she can come back in a couple days/weeks/months and start over. I may be Canadian born, but I am American trained. This is an all-out phyiscal war. I am stronger, faster, and far more bendy than her excuse-making self will ever be.